Emotional purity is a concept that many single Christians wrestle with in the dating process. While much emphasis is often placed on physical purity, emotional purity is equally important and can significantly impact a person’s heart, mind, and future relationships.

In today’s dating culture, where emotional connections can form quickly through social media, texting, and online dating platforms like SALT, it’s crucial to understand what emotional purity means and how to protect it. Let’s explore this topic and discover practical ways to honor God in our relationships.

What is Emotional Purity?

Emotional purity refers to guarding your heart and emotions from unnecessary emotional attachments, intimacy, and dependence outside of God’s intended design. It means keeping our emotions in check and aligning them with God’s will rather than allowing them to lead us into unhealthy or premature emotional entanglements.

Proverbs 4:23 reminds us, “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” Emotional purity involves being intentional about whom we give our emotional energy to and ensuring our relationships are grounded in wisdom, not just feelings.

Why is Emotional Purity Important?

Emotional purity is important because it helps to:

1. Protect your heart from unnecessary hurt – Jumping into emotional intimacy too soon can lead to deep wounds and heartbreak.
2. Prevent emotional baggage – Carrying unresolved emotions from past relationships can hinder future ones.
3. Align your relationships with God’s timing – Waiting on God’s plan allows relationships to develop with clarity and purpose.
4. Maintain focus on your identity in Christ – Emotional entanglements can distract from your spiritual growth and purpose.

How Can Christians Protect Their Emotional Purity in Dating?

Here are 20 practical ways to guard your emotional purity while dating:

1. Seek God First – Before entering a relationship, make sure your heart and identity are firmly rooted in Christ (Matthew 6:33).
2. Set Clear Boundaries – Decide in advance what emotional and physical boundaries you will uphold.
3. Guard Your Conversations – Avoid sharing deep emotional details too soon; take your time to build trust.
4. Be Intentional with Your Time – Spending too much time with one person can create an emotional attachment quickly.
5. Use a Christian Dating App Like SALT – Platforms like SALT allow you to meet like-minded believers who share your values and focus on godly dating.
6. Seek Accountability – Involve trusted friends, mentors, or church leaders to help keep you accountable.
7. Pray for Wisdom – Ask God for discernment before investing your heart in someone.
8. Take Things Slowly – Emotional intimacy should grow at a healthy, prayerful pace.
9. Avoid Fantasizing – Be careful not to idealize a relationship or person beyond reality.
10. Evaluate Your Motives – Make sure your desire for a relationship comes from a place of contentment in God, not loneliness or pressure.

More boundaries

11. Keep Friendships First – Develop a solid friendship before diving into deeper emotions.
12. Stay Busy with Your Calling – Focus on your career, ministry, and personal growth, rather than obsessing over a relationship.
13. Don’t Ignore Red Flags – If something feels off, seek God’s guidance before moving forward emotionally.
14. Be Honest About Your Struggles – If you find yourself becoming too emotionally attached, talk to a mentor or trusted friend.
15. Know Your Worth – Recognize that your value comes from God, not your relationship status.
16. Learn to Say No – If a relationship is leading you away from God, be willing to walk away.

17. Avoid Isolation – Stay connected to a community that encourages healthy relationships.
18. Practice Emotional Self-Control – Learn to manage your emotions rather than letting them control you.
19. Communicate Expectations – Talk about emotional boundaries with your partner early on.
20. Trust God with Your Future – Let go of control and trust God’s timing for your relationships.

Final Thoughts

Emotional purity is a journey that requires self-awareness, discipline, and trust in God’s plan for your life. Whether you are dating in person or using apps like SALT to connect with other Christian singles, it’s essential to protect your heart and seek God’s will above all else.

Remember, the goal of emotional purity is not to avoid love, but to enter into relationships in a way that honors God and ultimately leads to a healthy, Christ-centered marriage. By applying these practical tips and staying grounded in God’s Word, you can navigate the dating world with confidence and wisdom.