Navigating the world of online Christian dating can be both exciting and a bit overwhelming. With the rise of dating apps like SALT, designed specifically for Christian singles, it’s easier than ever to connect with people who share your faith and values. However, it’s important to approach online dating prayerfully and with discernment. While many wonderful relationships have blossomed through these platforms, there are also potential pitfalls to watch out for. Below are 20 red flags to keep in mind as you navigate the online dating world.

1. They Avoid Talking About Their Faith

Faith is the cornerstone of a Christian relationship. If someone seems hesitant to discuss their relationship with God or avoids faith-related topics altogether, it may signal that they don’t share the same spiritual priorities.

2. Their Actions Don’t Match Their Words

Jesus said, “You will know them by their fruits” (Matthew 7:16). Pay attention to whether their behavior aligns with the Christian values they claim to hold.

3. They Rush Into the Relationship

While excitement is natural, someone pushing for a commitment too quickly might not be prioritizing discernment or God’s timing. Healthy relationships take time to build.

4. They Exhibit a Lack of Transparency

If someone is vague about their personal life, family, or even their past relationships, it might indicate that they’re hiding something. Open and honest communication is essential.

5. They Don’t Have a Church Community

Being part of a church is vital for spiritual growth. If they don’t attend church or can’t describe how they’re involved in their faith community, this could be a red flag.

6. Their Profile Is Inconsistent

Mismatched information in their profile or discrepancies between what they say and what’s listed can indicate dishonesty. Always verify details when something seems off.

7. They’re Reluctant to Meet in Person

Long online conversations can be great, but if someone continually avoids meeting face-to-face or on a video call, this could suggest they’re not being genuine.

8. They’re Overly Focused on Physical Appearance

While attraction is important, an overemphasis on physical beauty over character and faith can signal misplaced priorities.

9. They Avoid Accountability

Healthy Christians are willing to submit to accountability through mentors or spiritual leaders. A lack of accountability can lead to unhealthy relationship dynamics.

10. They Pressure You to Compromise Your Values

If someone encourages you to bend your boundaries or question your biblical convictions, it’s a clear sign they might not be the right fit.

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11. They Speak Negatively About Others

Pay attention to how they talk about their past relationships or people in their life. A pattern of negativity could indicate unresolved bitterness or a lack of grace.

12. They Dismiss Your Concerns

If you bring up a concern and they downplay it or make you feel guilty for asking, it may signal a lack of emotional maturity.

13. They Display Controlling Behavior

A partner should encourage your freedom in Christ, not control or dominate you. Watch for possessiveness or jealousy early on.

14. They Show Inconsistent Interest

Someone who frequently ghosts you or sends mixed signals may not have the commitment or clarity you deserve.

15. They Don’t Show Kindness to Others

How someone treats waitstaff, family, or strangers speaks volumes about their character. Look for consistent kindness and humility.

16. They Ignore Boundaries

Healthy relationships respect boundaries. If someone continually pushes your limits, take it as a warning sign.

17. They Lack a Teachable Spirit

A teachable spirit is essential for growth, both personally and in a relationship. Beware of someone who is overly defensive or unwilling to learn.

18. They Rely on Flattery Instead of Genuine Connection

Compliments are great, but if their communication is overly focused on flattery without meaningful conversation, they may lack depth.

19. They Seem More Interested in Dating Than in God

Our first and greatest relationship is with God. Someone who prioritizes dating over their walk with Christ may not share the same commitment to spiritual growth.

20. They Don’t Use Christian Dating Platforms

Using a dating app like SALT, designed specifically for Christians, ensures that you’re connecting with people who share your faith and values. While no platform is perfect, SALT’s commitment to fostering faith-filled relationships can be a great starting point.

Online dating can be an amazing tool when approached with prayer, wisdom, and discernment. Remember, red flags aren’t always deal-breakers, but they are invitations to slow down, pray, and seek counsel. Keep your heart open to God’s leading, and trust that He is working in your love story for His glory.

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