This post suggests boundaries Christian couples can put in place when they vacation together to honor God with their relationship.
TL;DR: The Summary
There are Christian singles who have traveled together without any issues. They set boundaries early, make clear arrangements, and end up having a great time. However, I believe this is the exception, not the rule. Don’t base your decisions on exceptions. Use discernment—and if something doesn’t feel right, take that as a nudge from the Holy Spirit.
On the other hand, if you fall into the category where traveling with the opposite sex isn’t a tempting situation for you, here are five tips you can use if you’re planning a trip together for a holiday, family gathering, or another special occasion.
- Avoid Overnight Stays Together
- Don’t Isolate from Community
- No Shared Sleeping Arrangements
- Limit Physical Affection in Private
- Choose Group Trips over Solo
There needs to be self-awareness. Be honest with yourself about what you can and cannot handle. Some people may say you’re being overly religious or cautious, but if you know that traveling with this person could lead to poor judgment, then don’t do it. It’s like having a food allergy—if you’re allergic to strawberries, you avoid them, even if others can eat them without any issues. In the same way, if something feels off or you find yourself hesitating and asking, “Should I do this?”—then the answer is no. Trust your discernment.
Intro
“Should I go on a vacation trip with my significant other?” There are differing opinions on both sides of this conversation. Some believe it’s not a good idea to travel with someone of the opposite sex you’re dating, as it could lead to temptation. Others believe it’s perfectly fine—as long as boundaries are put in place to protect both individuals.
Whatever side you’re on when it comes to traveling with the opposite sex, remember that the Bible encourages us to flee even the appearance of evil. Of course, everyone is different. What may be a tempting situation for one person may not be the same for someone else.
For example, one person might change their playlist because they feel convicted about the type of music they listen to. Another may have strong convictions about the movies they watch. It could be argued that you should follow whatever convicts your spirit. I agree that we should be mindful of our actions in Christian dating, because we don’t want our good to be spoken of as evil. It’s also wise to be self-aware—if you know your personal tendencies and how they’ve led to mistakes in the past, it’s probably best not to travel alone with someone of the opposite sex.
But if you’ve prayed and feel it’s a good move for you and your partner to vacation together think about boundaries.
Avoid Overnight Stays Together
No matter how “harmless” it may seem, sharing a hotel or Airbnb is playing with fire. Even if you book separate rooms, all it takes is one late-night movie, one deep conversation, one vulnerable moment—and the line can blur quickly. Physical boundaries weaken when you’re tired, relaxed, and far from accountability.
Sexual temptation intensifies in private settings where emotional closeness is already present. God calls us to flee—not flirt with—temptation. Protect what you’re building by avoiding situations that compromise your values. This isn’t about fear; it’s about wisdom, honor, and long-term trust. You’re setting a spiritual tone for your future together.
Choose inconvenience
I remember flying from Texas to New York to attend my then-fiancé’s mother’s 70th birthday. Although we were already engaged and planning our wedding for later that summer, I stayed in a separate hotel room. Even when we spent time alone, he never came to my room, and I never invited him up. Some might argue, “You’re getting married—what’s the harm if something happens between you two?” But we had agreed that we wanted to say our vows before God and our families with a clear conscience.
You might think, I’m an adult—I can do whatever I want. And yes, you do have free will. But as Paul says in the Bible, “All things are lawful for me, but not all things are beneficial.” What does this mean? Just because you can do something doesn’t mean it’s wise or good for you. For example, you can eat sweets all day if you want—you’re grown, and if you paid for them, they’re yours. But over time, that behavior will harm your body and could lead to disease.
True freedom
Some may also argue they’re free to have sex with whomever they want, as long as there’s consent. And yes, you are a person with real and legitimate sexual desires. But with more sexual partners comes a higher risk of emotional baggage, unplanned pregnancy, or sexually transmitted diseases.
Staying overnight while unmarried is simply not a wise decision. We’re not as strong as we like to believe. We’re human, with natural weaknesses. So why place yourself in a situation where temptation is likely? Don’t be naive. Don’t assume you’re strong enough to handle it. None of us are immune. If someone invites you to spend the night—at their home, a hotel, or anywhere private—that’s a red flag. It doesn’t mean they’re a bad person, but it’s something to pay close attention to. Recognize where this could lead and decide ahead of time to walk in wisdom.
Don’t Isolate from Community
Vacation is for rest—not spiritual isolation. When you unplug from church, accountability, and godly counsel, the enemy gains room to whisper. It’s easy to justify small compromises when no one is watching. But your relationship thrives in the light—not in secret shadows. Bring in trusted voices before you travel. Ask for prayer, encouragement, and reminders of your values. Check in during the trip. Community isn’t a cage; it’s your covering. Staying connected helps you enjoy each other freely, without the weight of guilt or secrecy.
There’s often this mindset: I’m a grown adult—I can make my own decisions, and I don’t need accountability. But this isn’t about seeking approval from others. It’s about honoring the Lord with your life and surrounding yourself with people who help you uphold that standard. Without that, you become an island. God did not intend for us to live in isolation. Accountability can come through people from your church, godly family members, friends, mentors, and counselors. Yes, you can pray and ask the Holy Spirit for guidance, but He often speaks through the people around you to give wisdom and direction.
Do you have support?
The real question is: are you willing to listen to that wisdom? Many Christian singles avoid it because deep down, they know the person will tell them the truth—and they’re not ready to face it. That becomes especially difficult when emotions are involved. You don’t want to hear reason because you’re focused on what you want, thinking you’re just enjoying yourself. But that mindset can lead to choices that aren’t in alignment with God’s best. As Christians, we need to do better when it comes to living by biblical standards. It’s not always popular, and it’s certainly not trendy—but God’s way is always the best way.
I can honestly say that on my wedding day, I spoke my vows with no condemnation trailing behind me. There is a peace that comes when you do things God’s way. That doesn’t mean your relationship or marriage will be free from challenges—but there’s a noticeable difference when you walk in obedience to Jesus. Yes, God forgives and restores. But that doesn’t mean we should abuse His grace. When you feel the Holy Spirit prompting you to leave or make a change, listen. The Bible says God always provides a way of escape when we’re tempted. If He speaks to you through someone in your inner circle, listen—don’t ignore it.
No Shared Sleeping Arrangements
Even if it’s cheaper or “just for convenience,” sharing a bed is never innocent. Physical proximity—no matter how disciplined you think you are—creates chemistry that clouds judgment. You’re not weak; you’re human. God wired us for attraction on purpose. But He also warned us to guard it until marriage. Choosing separate spaces says, “I honor you too much to risk your purity—or mine.” You’re not just protecting your bodies; you’re protecting peace, trust, and future intimacy. Don’t confuse comfort with wisdom.
I believe many Christian singles underestimate how much they can truly handle. I’ve heard countless stories of people who ended up slipping into sexual sin because they spent too much time alone or thought innocent cuddling wouldn’t go further. But cuddling often leads to kissing, kissing to making out, and making out to sex. In the heat of the moment, you’re not thinking clearly—because let’s be honest, sex feels good.
Pleasure is hard to resist
God designed it to be pleasurable. And nine times out of ten, you’re not thinking about stopping. You’re focused on your pleasure, and you don’t want it to end. But once it’s over, condemnation creeps in. Now you’re beating yourself up, which only invites shame. I’m not saying it’s easy to walk past temptation. But it is worth it when you can stand on your wedding day with a clear conscience.
God didn’t set these standards to suck the fun out of your life. He didn’t create rules and boundaries just to keep you from pleasure. He set them in place so you could experience sex in the best way possible—as He intended it. And the best way to experience sex as a believer is within the covenant of marriage. Period.
The benefits of boundaries
God never intended for you to give your body, soul, and mind to someone who hasn’t made a lifelong covenant with you. God made a covenant with us through the blood of His Son, Jesus Christ—so why would you accept anything less from someone who hasn’t vowed to love you in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, until death?
It’s heartbreaking how many Christian singles trade their purity for a few fleeting moments of pleasure. You are worth so much more than one sexual encounter. The enemy wants to rob you of the blessing that comes with sex in marriage. Many singles don’t think about this because they’re so focused on what isn’t happening that they never stop to ask, “Why does God want me to wait?”
As a married woman, I can honestly say there has never been guilt between me and my husband when it comes to intimacy. I’m not saying it was easy to wait—but there is no shame now that we’re married. In the end, it all comes down to your decision. Will you choose to do things God’s way and reap the benefits of that? Or will you choose your own path and walk through a season of emotional—and possibly physical—recovery because you chose your way over His?
Limit Physical Affection in Private
It starts with a cuddle on the couch, and before you know it—you’ve crossed a line. Affection is beautiful, but it belongs in the light. Save it for public places where boundaries are easier to maintain. The more you “practice” restraint in private, the more you train your body to override the Spirit. Why make things harder than they need to be? True intimacy begins with self-control. You’re not missing out—you’re building something that lasts. The wait is worth it.
I remember when my husband and I were in a long-distance relationship. He would make trips to visit me, and sometimes we’d sit and talk in my car. But whenever we felt the chemistry shift between us, one of us would say, “Okay, let’s call it a night.” We were clearly attracted to each other and had strong feelings, but we made the decision not to let those feelings take over until our wedding day. I still remember our first kiss—it caught me by surprise. As soon as it happened, we ended the evening, and he returned to his Airbnb.
Know your limits
Some people can kiss without it being a struggle. Others can hold hands and feel nothing. But it all comes down to knowing yourself and setting boundaries that protect you from yourself. You should also care enough about the other person not to lead them astray. When my husband—who was then my fiancé—and I were dating, we committed to practicing purity in our private moments, not just in person, but even during phone and video calls. Since we were long distance, we had many of those. Early on, we set a cutoff time for our conversations. Later, once we trusted that neither of us would lead the other astray, we revisited and relaxed that boundary—without compromising our standards.
Having these kinds of standards doesn’t make you a prude. It doesn’t make you “super religious” just because you value boundaries. Sometimes the hard part is risking the loss of a relationship if the other person doesn’t respect your standards. But if someone can’t honor your boundaries, that’s a clear sign they’re not the one for you. The right person will not only agree with your standards—they’ll have their own. When we were dating, my husband led with purity, which made it easy for me to share my own boundaries. We both wanted a relationship that honored God—and that’s what we pursued then and still practice now.
Choose Group Trips Over Solo
There’s safety in numbers—and that includes spiritual safety. Solo vacations may sound romantic but can lead to situations you didn’t intend. You might start with pure intentions, but emotional closeness and time alone can quickly blur boundaries. Traveling with friends or other couples helps keep your relationship grounded.
Group settings allow you to enjoy the experience without constant temptation. You can still connect deeply—just with accountability built in. Protecting your purity doesn’t mean avoiding fun; it means choosing a kind of fun that honors God and your future marriage.
During the dating phase, my husband and I didn’t take trips alone together. The only trip we took was to Galveston, TX—with my family—shortly before the wedding. Some might argue, “You were days away from getting married, so what’s the harm?” But we didn’t want anything to bring guilt or shame into our wedding day. We were committed to doing things God’s way, even if others didn’t understand.
The narrow path
Choosing God’s way can feel lonely at times. Following the Holy Spirit isn’t always popular, especially in a world that says, “Do whatever you want. Do whatever makes you happy.” The problem is, doing what makes you happy can often make someone else unhappy. While I’m not saying God wants us to be miserable, He didn’t call us only to pursue happiness.
God calls us to obedience and to follow His commandments. The Bible says that if we love Him, we will keep His commandments—including in our dating life. We don’t get to pick and choose where we’ll obey. Just like the children of Israel, we are given a choice—and God still encourages us to choose life. You can choose life today, knowing He honors obedience.
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