{"id":377,"date":"2024-03-12T14:31:19","date_gmt":"2024-03-12T14:31:19","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nrb.ttm.mybluehost.me\/?p=377"},"modified":"2025-03-13T10:43:59","modified_gmt":"2025-03-13T10:43:59","slug":"dating-diva","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nrb.ttm.mybluehost.me\/dating-diva\/","title":{"rendered":"Dating Diva: Am I Too Picky?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">There was a time, not long ago, when dating was something that could only happen \u201cin person\u201d.&nbsp; In fact, the very concept of a worldwide database where you can meet people who you know are already interested in dating would have been completely foreign &#8211; not just because the internet didn\u2019t exist, but because people were simply used to the organic nature of meeting someone and letting the pursuit run its course.&nbsp; Meeting someone \u201cblindly\u201d would be considered scary at best and desperate at worst.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Now things have changed, and dating apps are the standard for most people.&nbsp; We can literally meet hundreds of potential partners every day for free from the comfort of our own bedroom or couch or even toilet.&nbsp; Dating has changed significantly.&nbsp; Easy to meet, easy to chat, easy to break up, easy to ghost.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">So you\u2019d think that this technology, if done right, would single-handedly solve loneliness and bring us closer together, right?&nbsp; That if these dating app algorithms worked, people would be meeting their soulmates left and right and our population would just be exploding?&nbsp; Then why oh why is the birth rate in our society so low?&nbsp; And despite this ease of access, why in the world does it <em>still<\/em> feel so difficult to meet someone?&nbsp; Our <a href=\"https:\/\/www.be-salt.com\/social\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">SALT SOCIALites<\/a> chime in to this all-important question:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>\u201cI think it depends on the person, but mostly due to the ease of choice we have in these apps, it makes us more picky, even if we aren&#8217;t normally picky. It&#8217;s something that sticks with us unintentionally sometimes.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">-Abi<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"683\" height=\"1024\" src=\"https:\/\/nrb.ttm.mybluehost.me\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/girl-on-date-683x1024.jpeg\" alt=\"girl dancing outside\" class=\"wp-image-355\" srcset=\"https:\/\/nrb.ttm.mybluehost.me\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/girl-on-date-683x1024.jpeg 683w, https:\/\/nrb.ttm.mybluehost.me\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/girl-on-date-200x300.jpeg 200w, https:\/\/nrb.ttm.mybluehost.me\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/girl-on-date-768x1152.jpeg 768w, https:\/\/nrb.ttm.mybluehost.me\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/girl-on-date-1024x1536.jpeg 1024w, https:\/\/nrb.ttm.mybluehost.me\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/girl-on-date-8x12.jpeg 8w, https:\/\/nrb.ttm.mybluehost.me\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/girl-on-date.jpeg 1184w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 683px) 100vw, 683px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-enter-the-dating-diva\">Enter The Dating Diva<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I\u2019ll call her that, although it\u2019s certainly not exclusively women who are doing this.&nbsp; In our world of seemingly infinite options (especially the Christian world where we\u2019re dating to marry), our choices actually seem to <em>narrow<\/em> because we become, whether we like it or not, <em>extremely picky<\/em>.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You see a profile, but aren\u2019t immediately attracted or intrigued?&nbsp; Boom, gone, swiped away.&nbsp; Had you met them in person you might have found something you liked about them &#8211; maybe you\u2019d have a conversation with them, observed them do something they\u2019re passionate about, admired them in a social setting, or seen them at just the right angle with the light bouncing off the building\u2026.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">But no.\u00a0 The Dating Diva does not get that opportunity.\u00a0 She only gets to see him for a second, in one very specific context, and if it isn\u2019t happening, that\u2019s it, he\u2019s gone from her life forever.\u00a0 No question of &#8220;<a href=\"https:\/\/nrb.ttm.mybluehost.me\/quirky-date\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">should I hide my quirks on a first date<\/a>?&#8221; or anything similar.  We\u2019ve traded depth for breadth in the name of convenience, and where has it got us?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>\u201cDating app culture means someone can be easily dismissed\/overlooked because there\u2019s another profile just a swipe away. I try to remain open, but it\u2019s still difficult to not be picky.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">-Rob<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-so-are-we-better-off-now-or-before\">So are we better off now or before?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It seems like I\u2019m saying we were better off before, but as someone who met my wife on <a href=\"https:\/\/www.be-salt.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">SALT<\/a> and have been happily married for 3 years and have a one-year-old little boy, I can\u2019t say that I\u2019m 100% certain.&nbsp; Was I pickier in person, or was I just at a point in my life where I was ready to settle down and the first person that looked like a good match worked out for me?&nbsp; Are we all like that?&nbsp; Is that how it\u2019s always worked?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>\u201cDating apps are a symptom of our picky desires, not the cause of them.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">-Chloe<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>\u201cIf it were easy to find like-minded singles in real life, a lot fewer people would be using these apps! And I think being too picky comes from having expectations that don&#8217;t match reality, which is a deeper problem and not the fault of the dating apps.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">-Jacob<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The reality might be that The Dating Diva comes out more because despite the increased options, the reality is the same &#8211; we go after someone when we\u2019re ready to be with someone.&nbsp; Otherwise we\u2019re \u201cpicky\u201d.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>\u201cUltimately, everyone on here is human &#8211; the \u2018perfect\u2019 partner doesn\u2019t exist.&nbsp; Sometimes people need to be given a chance, but we don\u2019t allow that because if we don\u2019t get an instant spark we can miss a great relationship.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">-Jackie<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-dating-apps-or-not\">Dating apps or not?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And when we are ready &#8211; when The Dating Diva, who has protected us from the onslaught of choice, is ready to be put to rest &#8211; are dating apps really the way to go?&nbsp; There\u2019s a lot to consider, even for people who are ready to settle down and get serious.&nbsp; Can you really get a feel for someone based solely on their dating profile?&nbsp; Are you setting yourself up for heartache and disappointment by dropping the The Dating Diva a little too much?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>\u201cIn real life you may consider people you probably wouldn\u2019t on the app as you get to know them personally.&nbsp; But when you\u2019re on dating apps, you judge by what people write and the photos they have, and you try not to go for people who are not an immediate match on paper.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">-Heidi<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>\u201cWhether it\u2019s a necessary solution or not, dating apps do feel somewhat akin to online shopping. The pictures look alright, the \u2018descriptions\u2019 sound okay, but you never quite know what you&#8217;re getting until you can see the \u2018merchandise\u2019 in person.&nbsp; And this just doesn\u2019t feel like how we should be treating or viewing one another.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">-Chris<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And after a couple of dates where you meet this supposed person of your dreams and realize they aren\u2019t the one you want to be with, The Dating Diva returns in full force.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-so-what-s-the-solution-to-this-problem\">So what\u2019s the solution to this problem?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A lot of it comes down to the quality of the app you\u2019re on.&nbsp; What information can you learn about a person based on how their profile setup is catered?&nbsp; How does the matching work?&nbsp; What is there to match on, other than random stuff in their profile and a cute picture?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I might be a little biased, but I really believe I met my wife on SALT as easily as I did because of <a href=\"https:\/\/nrb.ttm.mybluehost.me\/good-dating-apps\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">how effective SALT is<\/a>.&nbsp; I got a flavour of her passions and interests from her badges.&nbsp; She had specific faith-based answers that gave me a glimpse into her values. I could see her sense of humor, her cheeky grin, her intelligence.&nbsp; I could see my potential future wife and I couldn\u2019t wait to swipe right.&nbsp; Can\u2019t say other apps hit this sweet spot quite so well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">So if you\u2019re like me and The Dating Diva seems to be an ever-haunting force in your search for a Christian spouse, may I suggest switching it up?&nbsp; <a href=\"https:\/\/onelink.to\/websiteurl\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Give SALT a try<\/a>, and you\u2019ll find more than just a dating app waiting for you.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>There was a time, not long ago, when dating was something that could only happen \u201cin person\u201d.&nbsp; In fact, the very concept of a worldwide database where you can meet people who you know are already interested in dating would have been completely foreign &#8211; not just because the internet didn\u2019t exist, but because people [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":11,"featured_media":61,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[6],"tags":[30,14,22],"class_list":["post-377","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dating-apps","tag-all","tag-dating-profile","tag-salt-social"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v27.7 (Yoast SEO v27.8) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Dating Diva: Am I Too Picky? - SALT &amp; Life<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Dating Diva here. 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