{"id":2970,"date":"2025-07-03T13:47:17","date_gmt":"2025-07-03T13:47:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nrb.ttm.mybluehost.me\/?p=2970"},"modified":"2025-07-03T13:47:19","modified_gmt":"2025-07-03T13:47:19","slug":"singleness-or-marriage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nrb.ttm.mybluehost.me\/singleness-or-marriage\/","title":{"rendered":"Singleness or Marriage: Which is Better as a Christian?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">This post acknowledges that marriage is not the end of the Christian race and looks at the objective pros and cons of both singleness and marriage.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-tl-dr-the-summary\">TL;DR: The Summary<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Let\u2019s ask the question: \u201cIs it better to be single than to marry as a Christian?\u201d I don\u2019t think the question is about what\u2019s better. The real question is: \u201cCan God get the most glory out of my life as a single person or as a married one?\u201d With that being said, let\u2019s break down how we can best answer this complex question:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ol class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><a href=\"#h-both-singleness-and-marriage-are-divine-gifts\">Both Singleness and Marriage are Divine Gifts<\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"#h-it-s-about-god-s-plan-for-your-life\">It\u2019s About God\u2019s Plan for Your Life<\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"#h-free-will-plays-a-role\">Free Will Plays a Role<\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"#h-fulfilment-comes-from-god-not-relationship-status\">Fulfilment Comes from God, Not Relationship Status<\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"#h-you-can-impact-the-kingdom-either-way\">You Can Impact the Kingdom Either Way<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">As you can see, it\u2019s not about one being better than the other. Being single doesn\u2019t make you less than, and wanting to share your life with someone isn\u2019t wrong. Both paths are valid and valuable. Let\u2019s dig deeper so you can determine where you land on the spectrum.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed is-type-video is-provider-youtube wp-block-embed-youtube wp-embed-aspect-16-9 wp-has-aspect-ratio\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\n<iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"Being single beats being married\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/WlDt0BOZ9SA?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share\" referrerpolicy=\"strict-origin-when-cross-origin\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe>\n<\/div><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-intro\">Intro<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201cMaybe it\u2019s better if I don\u2019t get married.\u201d I can\u2019t tell you how often I hear Christian singles talk themselves into permanent singleness because they&#8217;ve been single for a long time. They reach a certain age and think, \u201cMaybe this is God&#8217;s will,\u201d instead of holding onto hope because they still desire marriage. Some even quote Paul to justify their position, but it\u2019s important to take a closer look at what Paul actually said:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201cFor I wish that all men were even as I myself. But each one has his own gift from God, one in this manner and another in that\u201d (1 Corinthians 7:7, NKJV).<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Do you see that? \u201cEach one has his own gift from God.\u201d This means that some people are gifted with singleness, while others are gifted with the desire for marriage. So, how can you tell which you are? I think it\u2019s simple. If you\u2019ve <em>never <\/em>wanted to get married and prefer it that way, you\u2019re probably <a href=\"https:\/\/nrb.ttm.mybluehost.me\/gift-of-singleness\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">called to singleness<\/a>. But if you still desire marriage, you may have the gift of marriage. And just because you\u2019ve been waiting for a long time doesn\u2019t mean marriage won\u2019t happen for you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-both-singleness-and-marriage-are-divine-gifts\">Both Singleness and Marriage are Divine Gifts\u00a0<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<ol class=\"wp-block-list\"><\/ol>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201cBut I want you to be without&nbsp;care.&nbsp;He who is unmarried&nbsp;cares for the things of the Lord\u2014how he may please the Lord.&nbsp;But he who is married cares about the things of the world\u2014how he may please&nbsp;<em>his<\/em>&nbsp;wife,\u201d (1 Corinthians 7:32, NKJV).&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">What is Paul saying here? He referred to the \u201cpresent distress\u201d in the world. The persecution of Christians during the early church era was horrific. Paul also mentioned that the \u201ctime was short,\u201d as most Christians believed that Jesus could return at any moment. Remaining single meant having fewer distractions, especially when your life could be at risk.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-life-s-focus\">Life&#8217;s focus<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">As an unmarried person, one could focus entirely on the calling of the Lord. It offered more freedom. Marriage creates a deep emotional bond, and as Paul pointed out, it divides your affections. You not only aim to please the Lord but also have to consider your spouse. This affects every area of life, including where you\u2019ll live and how you\u2019ll spend money. For example, if God tells you to give $1,000 to a local charity, and your spouse disagrees, you\u2019re caught in the middle. However, if your spouse is equally yoked and shares your spiritual discernment, they\u2019ll support what God is asking of you\u2014even if they don\u2019t fully understand it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">This, however, does not diminish the gift of marriage. Contrary to worldly opinions, marriage is not a prison or a \u201cball and chain.\u201d It\u2019s not meant to suffocate or hold you back. If anything, marriage is designed to help you become more like Christ. It\u2019s another level of self-sacrifice and surrender. In marriage, you die to yourself daily so that you and your spouse can become one in mind, body, and spirit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I once heard a pastor say, \u201cThe more you die, the more your marriage will live.\u201d Isn\u2019t that the essence of the Gospel? Dying to ourselves daily to become more like Jesus? When God is the center of your union, He can bring glory through it. He teaches you how to be a good husband or wife. He uses your marriage as a witness to others\u2014through how you pray, laugh, and live together. Your marriage is meant to be a stage that displays Jesus.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-it-s-about-god-s-plan-for-your-life\">It\u2019s About God\u2019s Plan for Your Life<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<ol start=\"2\" class=\"wp-block-list\"><\/ol>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Is it better to be single than married? Personally, I believe it depends on God\u2019s plan for your life. If His will includes a spouse, He will ensure you meet them. If it doesn\u2019t\u2014and you\u2019ve never felt the desire to be married\u2014then there\u2019s no need to worry about it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Many Christian singles feel pressure from society and even their families to get married. Let\u2019s say someone is genuinely called to singleness, but those around them start asking probing questions. Instead of speaking up, some might make poor relationship decisions, ultimately hurting themselves in the long run.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-seek-for-yourself\">Seek for yourself<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">While most families mean well, it\u2019s essential to seek God\u2019s will for your life. Your parents may have a vision for your future, but God has the final word. What does <em>He<\/em> want for you? Do your desires align with His will? Start with your relationship with God and let Him guide you. He may lead you to a spouse\u2014or He may not.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-biblical-wisdom\">Biblical wisdom<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Do you trust that God has good things planned for you? That His plans are not to harm you but to help you thrive and bring Him glory? Jeremiah 29:11-13 says: \u201cFor I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the&nbsp;Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will&nbsp;call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will&nbsp;listen to you. <strong><sup>&nbsp;<\/sup><\/strong>And&nbsp;you will seek Me and find&nbsp;<em>Me,<\/em>&nbsp;when you search for Me&nbsp;with all your heart (NKJV).&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">We often quote verse 11, but I want to emphasize verses 12 and 13. When we call on God, He listens. When we seek Him, we find Him. Want to know God\u2019s plan for your life\u2014whether it includes singleness or marriage? Simply ask Him. There\u2019s no wrong answer. Matthew 7:7-8 encourages us: \u201cAsk, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.&nbsp;For&nbsp;everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened (NKJV).<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ask your Heavenly Father, \u201cWhat\u2019s Your plan for my life?\u201d Will He reveal everything at once? Probably not. But step by step, He will make His plans clear. Whether you end up with a ring on your finger or not, you can trust that His plans are good and perfect.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-free-will-plays-a-role\">Free Will Plays a Role<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<ol start=\"3\" class=\"wp-block-list\"><\/ol>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I think we sometimes forget that we have a choice in this matter. Yes, we may feel pressure from society, family, and friends, but ultimately, the decision is ours. If we\u2019re truly seeking God\u2019s will for our lives, our desires will eventually align with His. Why? Because we love Him and want to please Him.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">God knows and sees our deepest desires. When we surrender those desires to Him, we can trust Him with the outcome. Some may wonder, \u201cWhat if it\u2019s God\u2019s will for me not to be married? I really want to be married.\u201d Again, God knows our hearts. If you have a genuine desire for marriage, I don\u2019t believe He gives you that desire just to withhold it. Proverbs 13:12 says, \u201cHope deferred makes the heart sick, but when the desire comes, it is a tree of life\u201d (NKJV).<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-biggest-soul-cry\">Biggest soul-cry<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I know many hearts feel heavy from being single for a long time. Maybe you\u2019ve never been on a date, or perhaps you were close to marriage, but the engagement ended. Some won\u2019t admit it, but they\u2019ve grown resentful toward God, asking, \u201cWhy hasn\u2019t He blessed me with a spouse?\u201d We need to be cautious with this kind of thinking because it can sound entitled. God doesn\u2019t owe us anything except eternal separation from Him due to sin. Anything He gives is because of His unfailing grace and mercy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A better prayer might be, \u201cGod, I want my future marriage to glorify You.\u201d Many people view marriage primarily as a romantic bond. While marriage can be romantic and fun, it\u2019s ultimately meant to refine us to be more like Jesus. The process of dying to self is real. If we struggle to die to ourselves now in singleness, marriage will be even harder. So, remember\u2014you have a choice in the matter.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-fulfilment-comes-from-god-not-relationship-status\">Fulfilment Comes from God, Not Relationship Status\u00a0<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<ol start=\"4\" class=\"wp-block-list\"><\/ol>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">While we know this to be true, we all need the reminder now and then. It\u2019s sad that both the world and even church culture often make Christian singles feel \u201cless than\u201d if they\u2019re not married. Some ministries don\u2019t even have anything specifically for singles. It\u2019s either for married couples or for the youth.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">But what about the single woman approaching forty? What about the single man turning thirty-five? I even heard a story about a single woman who was asked to volunteer in the children\u2019s ministry because it was assumed she had nothing else to do. What a sad assumption! Does being single mean you lack meaning or purpose? Does it mean you can\u2019t be busy with your own plans?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">What if you wanted to travel alone or with friends? I\u2019ve even heard of Christian singles being discouraged from buying their first home because they weren\u2019t married yet. What? Not to mention how some churches won\u2019t even consider single people for leadership roles. Can we stop this warped kind of thinking?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-feeling-inferior-as-a-single\">Feeling inferior as a single<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">These assumptions can make Christian singles feel inferior. Instead of singleness being viewed as a gift, it becomes a problem to solve. If they don\u2019t \u201cfix\u201d this problem, they feel like their life is over\u2014that they\u2019ve failed. But do you want to know the ultimate failure in life? It\u2019s not singleness; it\u2019s not knowing Jesus. Mark 8:36 says, \u201cFor what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul?\u201d (NKJV).<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Read that again. You can have everything in the world and still lose if you don\u2019t have Jesus. Married or not, Jesus is the ultimate relationship. I know we hear \u201cJesus is enough,\u201d and some of us roll our eyes. It sounds clich\u00e9 because we hear it so often. But even though it\u2019s true, it doesn\u2019t negate your desire for marriage. I understand. I was single for twelve years before I got married, and I remember the low moments of wanting to be with someone, only to face another year unmarried.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-the-best-relationship\">The best relationship<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Can I tell you something now, as a married woman? Even with the right person, your relationship with Jesus is still the ultimate one. I love my husband, but even he, in his humanness, cannot fulfill the deepest spaces in my heart. There are times I need to seek God for peace and clarity. There are also times he\u2019s told me, \u201cI need to get in the Word and pray.\u201d Sure, we\u2019re there for each other, but it\u2019s only after we\u2019ve been in the presence of God that we\u2019re better for each other.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Here\u2019s what I\u2019m saying: Jesus defines you\u2014not your relationship status. Don\u2019t let anyone make you feel inferior because of it. If you don\u2019t know who you are in Christ, I challenge you to start there before pursuing a spouse. You can only love your spouse as deeply as your relationship with Jesus.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-you-can-impact-the-kingdom-either-way\">You Can Impact the Kingdom Either Way<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<ol start=\"5\" class=\"wp-block-list\"><\/ol>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Is it better to be single or married as a Christian? The good news is, you can impact God\u2019s Kingdom either way. As a single, you have more freedom to follow God&#8217;s guidance\u2014picking up and going wherever He leads without needing to consult anyone aside from your inner circle and Godly counsel.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">If you choose to marry, God can still get glory as you and your spouse honor Him in your relationship. There\u2019s real power in showing others how God works through both of you. In doing so, you reflect the Gospel\u2014demonstrating how Jesus loves His bride, the Church.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The best way to answer this question is to ask, \u201cWhat are you called to? How can God get the most glory through your life?\u201d If you feel called to stay single, embrace it. There\u2019s nothing wrong with you. Remember, Jesus defines your identity. On the other hand, if you desire marriage, ask God to align your heart with His will for your <a href=\"https:\/\/www.be-salt.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">future spouse<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">If you\u2019re thinking, \u201cI\u2019ve waited so long. Will I ever get married?\u201d I don\u2019t know God&#8217;s timeline, but I encourage you to hold on to hope for your spouse. The enemy wants you to give up, stop believing, and lose faith. Don\u2019t let that happen! Keep praying for your future spouse and, in the meantime, continue to meet new people and put yourself out there. Use discernment as you date, and trust that God will reveal the right person in His perfect timing. He knows what He\u2019s doing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ready to meet some <a href=\"https:\/\/onelink.to\/websiteurl\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">incredible Christian singles<\/a>? Download the SALT Dating App now!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>This post acknowledges that marriage is not the end of the Christian race and looks at the objective pros and cons of both singleness and marriage. TL;DR: The Summary Let\u2019s ask the question: \u201cIs it better to be single than to marry as a Christian?\u201d I don\u2019t think the question is about what\u2019s better. The [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":12,"featured_media":2513,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[20],"tags":[30,8,11],"class_list":["post-2970","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-community","tag-all","tag-singleness","tag-theology"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v27.7 (Yoast SEO v27.8) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Singleness or Marriage: Which is Better as a Christian? - SALT &amp; Life<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Singleness is often seen as second best in Christian circles assuming everyone wants to get married. 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