Kristie\u0161u iepaz\u012b\u0161an\u0101s 50 gadu vecum\u0101 un v\u0113l\u0101k at\u0161\u0137iras no iepaz\u012b\u0161an\u0101s 20 vai 30 gadu vecum\u0101 \u2014 un tas nav nekas slikts. K\u0101 vec\u0101ks kristietis j\u016bs bie\u017ei vien atkal s\u0101kat iepaz\u012bties p\u0113c \u0161\u0137ir\u0161an\u0101s vai tuvinieka zaud\u0113juma, vienlaikus r\u016bp\u0113joties par pieaugu\u0161ajiem b\u0113rniem un iev\u0113rojot iedibin\u0101to ikdienas ritmu, un mekl\u0113jot k\u0101du, kur\u0161 iederas dz\u012bv\u0113, ko jau esat izveidojis, nevis taj\u0101, ko veidojat no jauna. \u0160aj\u0101 ce\u013cved\u012b ir aprakst\u012bts, kas patiesi at\u0161\u0137iras iepaz\u012b\u0161an\u0101s proces\u0101, ja esat vec\u0101ks kristietis 50 gadu vecum\u0101 un v\u0113l\u0101k, un k\u0101 pieiet tam ar cer\u012bbu, nevis ar spiedienu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Sasniedzot 50 gadu vecumu, parasti jau prec\u012bzi zini, ko mekl\u0113. Pievilc\u012bba joproj\u0101m ir svar\u012bga, ta\u010du raksturs, stabilit\u0101te un kop\u012bga tic\u012bba parasti ir daudz noz\u012bm\u012bg\u0101ki faktori nek\u0101 pirms da\u017eiem gadu desmitiem. Daudzi vec\u0101ki kristie\u0161i, kas dz\u012bvo vieni, saka to pa\u0161u: vi\u0146us maz\u0101k interes\u0113 cilv\u0113ks, ar kuru vienk\u0101r\u0161i ir jautri pavad\u012bt laiku, un vair\u0101k interes\u0113 k\u0101ds, kas ir pietiekami stabils, lai kop\u0101 ar vi\u0146u veidotu patiesu dz\u012bvi.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Ar\u012b praktisk\u0101 realit\u0101te ir cit\u0101da. Varb\u016bt j\u016bs atkal s\u0101kat satikties p\u0113c laul\u0101t\u0101 n\u0101ves vai p\u0113c negaid\u012btas \u0161\u0137ir\u0161an\u0101s. Varb\u016bt jums ir pieaugu\u0161i b\u0113rni, mazb\u0113rni, izveidotas draudz\u012bbas un m\u012b\u013c\u0101 m\u0101ja \u2014 un jaunaj\u0101m attiec\u012bb\u0101m ir j\u0101piel\u0101gojas visam \u0161im, nevis j\u0101aizst\u0101j to. Turkl\u0101t viet\u0113j\u0101 j\u016bsu vecuma neprec\u0113to kristie\u0161u kopiena var \u0161\u0137ist daudz maz\u0101ka nek\u0101 25 gadu vecum\u0101.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u0160aj\u0101 posm\u0101 ir ar\u012b viegli skat\u012bties uz citu cilv\u0113ku gadu desmitiem ilgaj\u0101m laul\u012bb\u0101m un br\u012bn\u012bties, k\u0101p\u0113c tavs st\u0101sts izskat\u0101s cit\u0101di. \u0160o saj\u016btu ir v\u0113rts god\u012bgi nosaukt \u2014 t\u0101 ir re\u0101la un izplat\u012bta. Ta\u010du t\u0101 nav liec\u012bba tam, ka ar tevi kaut kas nav k\u0101rt\u012bb\u0101 vai ka tevi ir atst\u0101ju\u0161i nov\u0101rt\u0101.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u012asum\u0101:<\/strong> Kristie\u0161u iepaz\u012b\u0161an\u0101s 50 gadu vecum\u0101 un v\u0113l\u0101k parasti noz\u012bm\u0113 liel\u0101ku skaidr\u012bbu par to, ko v\u0113laties, un jau izveidotu dz\u012bvi \u2014 vienlaikus ar maz\u0101ku, da\u017ek\u0101rt l\u0113n\u0101ku iepaz\u012b\u0161an\u0101s loku. Neviena no \u0161\u012bm liet\u0101m nav neveiksmes paz\u012bme.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ja esi bijis neprec\u0113jies ilg\u0101k, nek\u0101 gaid\u012bji, iesp\u0113jams, atpaz\u012bsi da\u017eas no \u0161\u012bm paz\u012bm\u0113m:<\/p>\n\n\n\n Par \u0161\u012bm saj\u016bt\u0101m ir v\u0113rts run\u0101t atkl\u0101ti, nevis t\u0101s apspiest. Ta\u010du tava v\u0113rt\u012bba nekad nav bijusi atkar\u012bga no tavas attiec\u012bbu statusa, un ilgs laiks, ko pavadi vienatn\u0113, nav nek\u0101ds pier\u0101d\u012bjums, iz\u0146emot to, ka tu joproj\u0101m gaidi \u012bsto cilv\u0113ku \u2014 nevis nepareizo pl\u0101nu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Viena lieta, ko vajadz\u0113tu maigi piemin\u0113t: da\u017eiem kristie\u0161iem v\u0113lme st\u0101ties laul\u012bb\u0101 var k\u013c\u016bt tik sp\u0113c\u012bga, ka s\u0101k \u0161\u0137ist, ka t\u0101 ir vien\u012bg\u0101 lieta, kas padar\u012btu dz\u012bvi piln\u012bgu. Ja tev tas \u0161\u0137iet paz\u012bstams, var\u0113tu pal\u012bdz\u0113t par to aprun\u0101ties ar uzticamu draugu, m\u0101c\u012bt\u0101ju vai psihologu \u2014 nevis t\u0101p\u0113c, ka v\u0113lme prec\u0113ties b\u016btu kaut kas nepareizs, bet t\u0101p\u0113c, ka tas pal\u012bdz \u0161o v\u0113lmi ierindot pareizaj\u0101 viet\u0101 l\u012bdz\u0101s visam p\u0101r\u0113jam, ko Dievs dara tav\u0101 dz\u012bv\u0113.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u012asum\u0101:<\/strong> Nogurums un nepaciet\u012bba ir izplat\u012bta par\u0101d\u012bba, un t\u0101 nav br\u012bdin\u0101juma sign\u0101ls par tavu tic\u012bbu vai n\u0101kotni \u2014 ta\u010du, ja laul\u012bba s\u0101k \u0161\u0137ist k\u0101 vien\u012bg\u0101 lieta, kas st\u0101v starp tevi un pilnv\u0113rt\u012bgu dz\u012bvi, par to ir v\u0113rts parun\u0101t ar k\u0101du, kuram uzticies.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ir vilino\u0161i m\u0113\u0123in\u0101t kontrol\u0113t katru main\u012bgo faktoru \u2014 laiku, rezult\u0101tus, citu cilv\u0113ku l\u0113mumus \u2014 it \u012bpa\u0161i p\u0113c vil\u0161an\u0101s. Pak\u013cau\u0161an\u0101s nenoz\u012bm\u0113 pasivit\u0101ti; t\u0101 noz\u012bm\u0113 neuzst\u0101t uz saviem pl\u0101niem p\u0101r\u0101k stingri un tic\u0113t, ka ilg\u0101ks laika periods nav laiks, kas izt\u0113r\u0113ts velti.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ja labi dom\u0101jo\u0161i draugi vai \u0123imenes locek\u013ci ir rad\u012bju\u0161i saj\u016btu, ka tavi standarti ir \u201cp\u0101r\u0101k augsti\u201d, ir v\u0113rts v\u0113lreiz apsv\u0113rt, kas tev paties\u012bb\u0101 ir svar\u012bgi, nevis pazemin\u0101t pras\u012bbas, lai pa\u0101trin\u0101tu notikumu gaitu. V\u0113l\u0113\u0161an\u0101s, lai partnerim b\u016btu t\u0101da pati tic\u012bba, konsekvence un god\u012bgums, nav p\u0101r\u0101k liela pras\u012bba nevien\u0101 vecum\u0101.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ilga gaid\u012b\u0161ana var pamudin\u0101t cilv\u0113kus r\u012bkoties divos gal\u0113jumos: vai nu saboj\u0101t kaut ko labu, baidoties, ka tas neizdosies, vai ar\u012b nepaman\u012bt re\u0101los br\u012bdin\u0101juma sign\u0101lus, jo vientul\u012bba \u0161\u0137iet smag\u0101ka par risku. Neviens no \u0161iem gal\u0113jumiem tev neder \u2014 m\u0113r\u0137is ir saglab\u0101t atv\u0113rt\u012bbu, vienlaikus piev\u0113r\u0161ot uzman\u012bbu tam, ko tev liecina otras personas r\u012bc\u012bba (nevis tikai v\u0101rdi).<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u0160o ce\u013cu ir m\u0113roju\u0161i daudzi cilv\u0113ki \u2014 tostarp ar\u012b lietotn\u0113 SALT. \u0160eit var apskat\u012bt vienu no pirmaj\u0101m sader\u012bb\u0101m \u0161aj\u0101 lietotn\u0113:<\/p>\n\n\n\nBie\u017ei sastopamas izj\u016btas \u2014 un k\u0101p\u0113c t\u0101s nenosaka to, kas tu esi<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
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Piecas lietas, kas pal\u012bdz, iepaz\u012bstoties 50 gadu vecum\u0101 un v\u0113l\u0101k<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
1. S\u0101ciet ar pak\u013cau\u0161anos, nevis kontroli<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
2. Noskaidro savus standartus<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
3. Izejiet randi\u0146\u0101 ar p\u0101rdom\u0101t\u012bbu, nevis izmisum\u0101<\/h3>\n\n\n\n